Sunday, August 28, 2011

Letters to my younger self

Wouldn't you love it if you could send a message back in time and warn your younger self about the things to come. Think about it like this, we're all worried about the uncertain future, wouldn't you love it if you could take a peek just to know if everything turns out ok?

If I could pass messages back to my younger self it would go something like this:

Note to my 10 yr old self:
Don't quit classical music as much as you hate it. It's gonna come in handy when you discover your country music singing abilities. Don't worry about your buck teeth and skinny frame. Your orthodontist is gonna do a great job and loads of women will envy you for eating what you want and still not getting fat. I know your younger brother seems like a baby right now, be patient he'll grow up soon and become your best friend one day.

Note to my 15 year old self:
Don't worry about those bullies, they might tell you now that you're a loser. Wait a few years you'll end up doing way better than any of them in life. Make a little more time to appreciate your parents and your mom's food especially. You're gonna miss the dishes you hate right now. By the way your still really skinny 10 years from now so don't loose sleep, you'll get used to it soon. Stop trying to grow up too soon and enjoy the last remaining moments of childhood.

Note to my 21 year old self:
Life is about to get a lot more real, brace yourself. If you think you have problems now think again. But the good news is you're gonna sail through all the really tough times and come out just right. I know it seems like everyone around you is in love except you, and you're really worried you'll never find someone. Well, just take it easy and enjoy the single life with your friends, a sweet handsome dude is headed your way, who'll be worth every moment of crap you have ever put up with. Oh and right now, you might think getting into the IT industry and becoming a software developer is your true calling in life. There will be a quarter life crisis when you realize that though you're pretty good at it, its not really your "thing". Stop worrying about losing touch with friends after college, those who matter will stay connected even from the other end of the planet.

I'm pretty sure my future self will have tons to say, but just as I have no hope of transmitting these notes to the past, there's no way of knowing whats up ahead. So much for wishful thinking. The only thing I do know is that things will fall into place no matter how screwed up they seem right now.

Monday, August 8, 2011

Friends of friends

When friendship day swung around this year, I took a while to think of all my friends, old and new. I tried to remember how I became friends with each person I could think of...

The past year has been one hell of a friend making year for me. I feel very lucky to be in a position in life where I meet new people almost everyday. And Ive just realized that almost all the people Ive gotten pretty close to, either for years now or just weeks, they almost all came into my life as a friend of a friend.

Friendship and love are the only two relationships in the world which we are in by choice. We don't get to choose our family but we do get to choose whom we are friends with. While we do have the option of being extremely picky about whom we befriend, Ive come to see that the best friendships are born out of going out of your way to be nice to someone.

Thinking back, I can think of a lot of instances which went like this. I'm stuck with a friend of a friend, someone I barely know. I have the option of really trying to get to know the person or just being civil for the short time we are stuck together. Ive always chosen the first option and today I'm sooo glad I did, because these people are among of my closest friends.

I see a lot of people who don't mingle with people they think is below their "league". People who go to a party only for the food and booze and not the company, and I feel sorry for them.

Its easy to just stay in your comfort zone, stereotype people you barely know and decide that you've got enough friends and you dont really need another one. Its harder to make genuine conversation with a friend of a friend, harder to care about what they are saying, but who knows if this person is someone you'l still be talking to 50 years from now? Heck I wouldn't have met my husband if I had decided that I have enough friends and don't need another person to talk to.

Happy friendship day, to all my dear friends who've touched my life and made me smile, and friends of friends who are going to make smile a little more.