Heard a lady say this on TV today "If we all got what we wished for, God's gonna be out of a job". I thought to myself thats not true!! Im thankful everyday. But after the hypocrite in me faded I realized its true. Every small problem in life is a test of faith. We don't really look to the Universe or God unless we're in relatively deep shit.
Ok so lets say I'm a deeply spiritual person and I sometimes have to believe that a higher power will look out for me and help me with situations totally out of my control. And lets say I've gotten my way most of the time so yes it hasn't been very hard to keep the faith. What happens when things don't really go my way, or I'm watching a situation unfold over which I have absolutely no control over but one that's definitely going to turn my world around (or upside down). How long will I keep the faith?
Will the same power which I just thanked for sending me moments in my life that literally took my breath away, listen when I ask to be rescued? Will there be a light at the end of the tunnel? And if there's a light will it just be a train that's gonna run me over? :D
All I can really do is wait out the storm, and hope that my faith was strong enough to keep my ship afloat. It is hard, but for now I'm keeping the faith.
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Friday, February 12, 2010
The Swan Song
Sometimes I find creativity an excellent outlet for heartache. The outcome doesn't make sense though :)
Your boat has arrived
And you'll leave with a smile
Don't turn around or you'll see me cry
If this world were flat,
I'd walk over the end..
If thats what it took for your heart to mend
My only wish is to see you smile
If that smile were to turn around
My only fear my dear
Is that I cant be around to catch those tears
This pain I'm afraid will take me away
Into the silence which I crave
Don't search for me now
We have to be brave.
In your dreams I'll still be there
And another sweet memory we'll share.
For there are some bonds
That cannot be broken,
But also some words you'll find
That cannot be spoken.
Your boat has arrived
And you'll leave with a smile
Don't turn around or you'll see me cry
If this world were flat,
I'd walk over the end..
If thats what it took for your heart to mend
My only wish is to see you smile
If that smile were to turn around
My only fear my dear
Is that I cant be around to catch those tears
This pain I'm afraid will take me away
Into the silence which I crave
Don't search for me now
We have to be brave.
In your dreams I'll still be there
And another sweet memory we'll share.
For there are some bonds
That cannot be broken,
But also some words you'll find
That cannot be spoken.
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Apocalypse
Wiki describes Apocalypse as "lifting of the veil" or "revelation". I think I might have had a mild version of it.
Its stupid to think that you would go to sleep one night felling one way, thinking one way, and wake up a completely different person! But that's exactly what happened on the night of 31st Dec 2009.
When I woke up on New Year's day 2010 I felt lot different upstairs. I no longer felt certain feelings towards certain individuals which just the previous day was hanging around in the recesses of my mind. Apart from that, my whole list of priorities were all shuffled up. I felt very unattached to things that bothered me till the moment I fell asleep the previous day. I felt free.
Maybe this was no miracle. Maybe 2010 triggered off this big fat alarm clock which I'd probably subconsciously set for myself. For what you ask? For cutting the CRAP out of my life. Some where along the line I'd set my self a deadline to get rid of the baggage.
To give up the comfort of my old ways isn't easy. But this false security was getting me nowhere in life. I don't even know if this new attitude is the right way to go about life but I guess I'll live with the consequences. So cut chop snap it is. Out with the fake friends, out with the people or situations that make me feel unworthy.
So if you really are not as happy as you ought to be, its time to put your foot down and tell the non-sense givers to take a hike. Forget about the consequences and do it for the sake of your inner peace. Look at where you stand right now in the big picture you had dreamt for yourself and ask yourself this: Is this how you thought things would be in 2010?
As Christopher Columbus puts it "You can never cross the ocean unless you loose sight of the shore"
Its stupid to think that you would go to sleep one night felling one way, thinking one way, and wake up a completely different person! But that's exactly what happened on the night of 31st Dec 2009.
When I woke up on New Year's day 2010 I felt lot different upstairs. I no longer felt certain feelings towards certain individuals which just the previous day was hanging around in the recesses of my mind. Apart from that, my whole list of priorities were all shuffled up. I felt very unattached to things that bothered me till the moment I fell asleep the previous day. I felt free.
Maybe this was no miracle. Maybe 2010 triggered off this big fat alarm clock which I'd probably subconsciously set for myself. For what you ask? For cutting the CRAP out of my life. Some where along the line I'd set my self a deadline to get rid of the baggage.
To give up the comfort of my old ways isn't easy. But this false security was getting me nowhere in life. I don't even know if this new attitude is the right way to go about life but I guess I'll live with the consequences. So cut chop snap it is. Out with the fake friends, out with the people or situations that make me feel unworthy.
So if you really are not as happy as you ought to be, its time to put your foot down and tell the non-sense givers to take a hike. Forget about the consequences and do it for the sake of your inner peace. Look at where you stand right now in the big picture you had dreamt for yourself and ask yourself this: Is this how you thought things would be in 2010?
As Christopher Columbus puts it "You can never cross the ocean unless you loose sight of the shore"
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Another helluva trip around the sun
Well it was another brilliant birthday! Thats what you get when you put most of my best friends under my roof :)
Things to be remembered and pondered upon:
Simple things in life like eating lunch together can be the most rewarding experience. Partying does not necessarily mean go out drinking or clubbing. Its just the right company that does all the magic!! A big thank you to all my angels who made my day!!!!! (My two other personas thank you too ;) )
The ones whom you love the most have the ability to get you hurt pretty bad. Though I guess this more your fault than theirs for investing too much of your happiness in them.
Hope there will be many more trips around the sun. A lot more smiles and a few less tears. Many happy times and fewer misunderstandings. Finally hopefully life will be just a little more fair.
Things to be remembered and pondered upon:
Simple things in life like eating lunch together can be the most rewarding experience. Partying does not necessarily mean go out drinking or clubbing. Its just the right company that does all the magic!! A big thank you to all my angels who made my day!!!!! (My two other personas thank you too ;) )
The ones whom you love the most have the ability to get you hurt pretty bad. Though I guess this more your fault than theirs for investing too much of your happiness in them.
Hope there will be many more trips around the sun. A lot more smiles and a few less tears. Many happy times and fewer misunderstandings. Finally hopefully life will be just a little more fair.
Sunday, November 29, 2009
When It Rains It Pours
Read on...
It's the thanksgiving weekend. I know its an American tradition but I've had such a brilliant day today I just felt like thanking the universe for its benevolence. So here goes thank you universe for giving me:
-Today, I hope I have many more like this one.
-My family, who proved to me today that they will stick up for me and love me unconditionally.
-My friends, some of them who know me better than me, who make me happy to be alive, especially the ones who made this day what it was.
-The internet (do not take it for granted!!), without which I'd never have had a medium to realize (like today for instance) just how much people care.
-Being alive, watching a documentary on Mumbai's 9/11 horror made me realize again how lucky I am just to be writing this.
-My sense of preservation. The ability to quickly sift between whats real and whats not. To have the courage to to do what's hardest for me to do. To clearly distinguish between 'maybes' and facts that will irreversibly change the course of happiness of my friends and family.
-Love, I've been given so much lately I'm starting to wonder how I got so lucky.
And finally,
-Luck, that which does not come often to me but as they say.. "When it rains it pours"
It's the thanksgiving weekend. I know its an American tradition but I've had such a brilliant day today I just felt like thanking the universe for its benevolence. So here goes thank you universe for giving me:
-Today, I hope I have many more like this one.
-My family, who proved to me today that they will stick up for me and love me unconditionally.
-My friends, some of them who know me better than me, who make me happy to be alive, especially the ones who made this day what it was.
-The internet (do not take it for granted!!), without which I'd never have had a medium to realize (like today for instance) just how much people care.
-Being alive, watching a documentary on Mumbai's 9/11 horror made me realize again how lucky I am just to be writing this.
-My sense of preservation. The ability to quickly sift between whats real and whats not. To have the courage to to do what's hardest for me to do. To clearly distinguish between 'maybes' and facts that will irreversibly change the course of happiness of my friends and family.
-Love, I've been given so much lately I'm starting to wonder how I got so lucky.
And finally,
-Luck, that which does not come often to me but as they say.. "When it rains it pours"
Sunday, October 25, 2009
As simple as that
Not fiction :)
It was a Sunday morning. The weather was perfect.
Aphrodite stood on the side of the street waiting for her friend Artemis to pick her up. She stood there with her extra heavy laptop, because a Sunday doesn't really mean a holiday in some cases. She smiled as the car drew up and got into the passenger seat. Artemis greeted her with a huge grin and a quick hug. "Its been a while", said Artemis. "Yeah, its good all of us are gonna be there today" said Aphrodite. A CD was playing and they squealed collectively when their favorite song came up. They lowered the windows, increased the volume and sang aloud with the wind in their hair... "Take me awayyyyyy".
A few minutes later they were at the door. Gaia opened the door with a big smile. Athena and Fortuna were already there. "About time!!!" said Gaia, and added "Oh no don't tell me your gonna connect and work!!!" she added when she saw the huge bag Aphrodite held. "I'm afraid I have to, for a few hours atleast",she replied. The other two joined them and they got talking to Gaia's aunt, who wanted to know all about Artemis's latest trip to the mountains. Suddenly Aphrodite's laptop started making a weird humming noise. "Be carefull, it sounds like its going to explode", said Athena laughing. "Noooo something is very worng!!" cried Aphrodite. "Oh God I think it just crashed!! I cant work!! Oh what am I going to do?", she panicked. The other four were quiet. She tinkered on with it a little longer and then declared, "Theres no hope, looks like the rest of my day is free" and the others whooped in joy.
They soon moved to Gaia's room and once out of the earshot of the aunt burst into spontaneous story telling. There was so much to discuss! Artemis's big trip and of course, boys. It was utter mayham before all of them swapped stories. There were heart breaks, new romances, office politics. There was a lot of relief as the girls shared their pent up frustrations and mixed emotions of boys and work: past present and future. The same favourite song played along in the background.. "..There's a place that I go, that nobody knows, where the rivers flow, and I call it home. And there's no more lies, in the darkness there's light. And nobody cries there's only butterflies.." If there was any song that could truly capture the moment that was it right there.
They then had lunch and suddenly decide to head out for ice cream. They laughed carefree like a bunch of 5 year olds. They looked a lot happier than most 23year olds at any rate! Men or no men these girls didn't need anyone else to truly cherish life. Thats what good friendship does to you.
Well life can be that uncomplicated, really. To find happiness in good company. Its as simple as that. :)
It was a Sunday morning. The weather was perfect.
Aphrodite stood on the side of the street waiting for her friend Artemis to pick her up. She stood there with her extra heavy laptop, because a Sunday doesn't really mean a holiday in some cases. She smiled as the car drew up and got into the passenger seat. Artemis greeted her with a huge grin and a quick hug. "Its been a while", said Artemis. "Yeah, its good all of us are gonna be there today" said Aphrodite. A CD was playing and they squealed collectively when their favorite song came up. They lowered the windows, increased the volume and sang aloud with the wind in their hair... "Take me awayyyyyy".
A few minutes later they were at the door. Gaia opened the door with a big smile. Athena and Fortuna were already there. "About time!!!" said Gaia, and added "Oh no don't tell me your gonna connect and work!!!" she added when she saw the huge bag Aphrodite held. "I'm afraid I have to, for a few hours atleast",she replied. The other two joined them and they got talking to Gaia's aunt, who wanted to know all about Artemis's latest trip to the mountains. Suddenly Aphrodite's laptop started making a weird humming noise. "Be carefull, it sounds like its going to explode", said Athena laughing. "Noooo something is very worng!!" cried Aphrodite. "Oh God I think it just crashed!! I cant work!! Oh what am I going to do?", she panicked. The other four were quiet. She tinkered on with it a little longer and then declared, "Theres no hope, looks like the rest of my day is free" and the others whooped in joy.
They soon moved to Gaia's room and once out of the earshot of the aunt burst into spontaneous story telling. There was so much to discuss! Artemis's big trip and of course, boys. It was utter mayham before all of them swapped stories. There were heart breaks, new romances, office politics. There was a lot of relief as the girls shared their pent up frustrations and mixed emotions of boys and work: past present and future. The same favourite song played along in the background.. "..There's a place that I go, that nobody knows, where the rivers flow, and I call it home. And there's no more lies, in the darkness there's light. And nobody cries there's only butterflies.." If there was any song that could truly capture the moment that was it right there.
They then had lunch and suddenly decide to head out for ice cream. They laughed carefree like a bunch of 5 year olds. They looked a lot happier than most 23year olds at any rate! Men or no men these girls didn't need anyone else to truly cherish life. Thats what good friendship does to you.
Well life can be that uncomplicated, really. To find happiness in good company. Its as simple as that. :)
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Twilight
Yes yes Stephanie Meyer is gonna sue me for flicking the name.
Its neither dark nor light
Its a glow beneath the trees
My hopes fall lightly to the ground
Like soft petals in a breeze
Its neither day nor night
The tears come fast with silent conviction
Quietly they stop without reason
Save for the breath held tight
One horizon's a brilliant band of light
The other a wall of black
Closer to which I know not
My mind numbed only by the emotions I lack
There's no right, There's no wrong
Is this called letting go?
On this path of twilight I belong
Or is this forging into the unknown?
Its neither dark nor light
Its a glow beneath the trees
My hopes fall lightly to the ground
Like soft petals in a breeze
Its neither day nor night
The tears come fast with silent conviction
Quietly they stop without reason
Save for the breath held tight
One horizon's a brilliant band of light
The other a wall of black
Closer to which I know not
My mind numbed only by the emotions I lack
There's no right, There's no wrong
Is this called letting go?
On this path of twilight I belong
Or is this forging into the unknown?
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