New beginings and happy endings and a bunch of crap inbetween

Disclaimer: The following contents are mildly disturbing. No substance abuse of any kind was involved.

I'm excited.. I'm scared.. I'm relieved...I'm insecure... I'm tired...I'm ecstatic... I'm shocked.. I'm sad.. I'm optimistic..
And I have to remind myself to breathe..

Its not fair that I have to handle ALL these emotions at the same time. But that's life I guess.. All or nothing.

I'm excited because I'm now officially employed.

I'm scared two fold because I have no idea what lies ahead AND because I'm expected to grow up in exactly three days.

I'm relieved two fold that today I successfully finished my engineering degree AND got my offer letter.

I'm insecure three fold. First because I'm leaving the security of my student routine. Second because this new path I have to walk alone. Third because I miss my best friends who would've somehow made this all way easier to handle.

I'm dead tired.. drained.. exhausted.. more emotionally than physically.

I'm ecstatic because this is technically one of the happiest days of my life.

I'm shocked because two people I really care about are having the toughest day and night of their lives so far.

I'm quite sad but I still haven't figured out why.

I'm strangely optimistic because the worst is behind me and the best, I know is yet to come.

That's for all the emotions I identify. There's stuff brewing in my brain which I don't even recognize. I so wish someone was reading my mind right now boy would they have a high voltage jolt. I have a million thought running through my weeny little head, not all of them very pleasant.

Wait I feel like I'm forgetting something... Oh yeah!!! BREATHE

Another milestone behind me..

They say the years you spend in college will probably be the best years of your life. Well... its true!!

Here I am a couple of weeks left for the last engineering exams I'll ever take... and it still hasn't sunken in.. that this is it... its over...

I really wont be missing the exams and the tension much :) but I'm sure as hell gonna miss all my friends! It's hitting me little at a time.. no more singing songs in the back benches during lectures.. No more taking crazy pics in class.. Never again will I open my homemade lunch in the canteen and watch a dozen hands tear up my mother's cooking... No more group cramming for internals in the last minute (where we ended up laughing more than we studied).. No more getting yelled at by the owners of ice cream parlors and coffee shops because we made "excessive noise"...No more people having crushes on each other in college.. even worse no more pulling anyone's leg about their crushes! How could I forget no more wild partying ( especially not on top of buses at 3 a.m atleast! ).

Obviously we all plan to stay in touch but I wonder how many of us actually will find the time to do it. I think the friendships you make during this time defines who you become and shapes your personality. Sure I'll meet a bunch of new people and make some more great friends... but the friends who stood by you when you came of age can never be replaced. I will look back on these years and it'll probably hard to pin point the exact time that I made the "transition" into adulthood but I'll always remember all the people around me when it happened. I hope I've grown up enough to make it in the real word without the constant support of all my buddies.

Ive been trying to rephrase this next line because its something everyone says all the time and don't really mean it. I've been trying to put it in a way to bring out its meaning and to prove to everyone of my friends how much I mean it. But looks like there is just one way of saying it after all... I'LL MISS YOU GUYS SOOOOO MUCH!!!!

I wish the very best to each and every one of you!! Hope life treats you fair everyday!! Will see you all in all the happy reunions to come :) take care

Birthday wishes for a special friend

Happy birthday smiley!!!! enjoy!! ;)

Dear Smiley,

We make friends everyday. But finding that special bond is realllly rare. Im glad I found that in you!! You make me feel special in a way that I cant really explain. If I'm a happier and better person today its because you played a major part in it. Your the best friend anyone could ask for :) and the memories of the fun times we had will stay with me forever! (I hope theres lots more to come!!)

I'm glad that though the Indian ocean today lies between us things are pretty much the same. There hasn't been a time so far that you've failed to cheer me up( or pull my leg) and I hope I've been half as useful to you :P Just want you to know that you can count on me for anything. I'll always be your partner in crime. (AND your very own stalker ;) ) I hope one day we do manage to kill "you know who" together!!

I know best friends forever sounds cliche but count me in!! :) Have a wonderful birthday in the land of the OZ!!
*giant bear hugs* ;)

- Ms Mantis

Soul Song :)

Yet another futile attempt to rhyme.. what the heck I couldn't care less as long as the feeling shows :D

The sun has risen in the east

The fresh air feels like a treat

There's a smile on my face

And my heart’s a bubblin

Bubblin with happy

My worlds technicolor again

Why this sudden surge of joy

I cannot explain

I can feel the love that goes around

I can hear a distant sound

Like tiny little bells tinkling

A wave of soothing feeling

That which feels like melted chocolate

Or the warmth of my favorite blanket

Im still tingling at my finger tips

Breathing in this magical bliss

Sure it might rain now

But I know I’ll find it somehow

A little ray of sunshine

Just enough feel fine

And get my heart a bubblin

Bubblin with happy

The dreaded M word

Well there I was... a happy little girl who was on the brink of finishing college and waiting to start a new life with brand new possibilities. My future was filled with promises of a career which brings with it freedom( read ka ching) , plans to do all kinds of fun things with my friends, partying and basically enjoying the single life. And then it crept up from behind me and BOOM Im running for the hills !!

It started when I was roughly a little older than 20 and word had gotten around that I have been placed in IBM. I was at a wedding of a distant relative and was busy in a conversation with my cousin when a lady I vaguely knew called me over. When I went over to her table she asked me to sit. She and another familiar looking lady turned their chairs to face me. "You are Vidya's daughter right? " she asked. When I said yes and asked what the matter was they just kept scrutinizing me. Scanned me from head to toe in a similar fashion to guys checking girls out. Then came the questions "Where are you placed?", "What are your plans for the future..?", "Can you cook..?", "Have u been trained in carnatic music..?" It went on and on like the stress interview from hell.!!! I was panicking and ran from the place the minute I got the chance. When I got back to my seat I found my cousin laughing uncontrollably with tears running down his face. When he saw the expression on my face he asked me "Do you know who those ladies were..?" I said I didn't know and he said "That's XYZ and ABC's mothers and I think they were interviewing you as a potential daughter in law!!". OH MY GOD I freaked. That was when I started being scared of the M word.

Another day I caught my mom stealthily using the computer. She was going through matrimonial websites!!! Heck I dint even know my mom knew how to switch on the comp and there she was surfing and printing out "interesting" profiles!! I gave her a earful but she insisted that she was just looking for fun and not "searching" seriously. NOW I was well into the panic zone.

Just when I'd gotten over the incident I was casually logging on to facebook one day and found an update from my school mate. It said she was married. I though it was a joke. Then I visited her profile and saw it wasn't!!! She really was married with complete pictures of her wedding!! I was still stunned when my best friend called and I burst out with this new information.. "WHAT is she out her freaking mind..??? shes 21 for God's sake" came the reply. Why someone would want to give into life long commitment so early was beyond me. I mean I do know the legal age to be married in India is 18 for girls but I guess I never really thought of anyone I know actually taking the plunge so early in life.

Well that was just the start. Soon we heard of other girls who studied with us at some point getting married and some were even expecting!!! Hell everyone grew up and me and my few sane friends seemed to be the only ones running for it at the mention of the M word.

I've kinda gotten used to the whole thing now. I dont freak when strange people call my house and ask me how tall I am or what my "nakshatram"(birth star) is. Though I still find public functions a total nightmare. Wonder how long it'll be before first my parents bend under the pressure of the M word.. *shudder* This sadly is the state of most girls my age in the so called modern day and age. Apparently a girl is ready to be married off the minute she's done with her education. Oh nobody bothers if she's independent and financially secure and all that. Hopefully it'll be different one day.. Till then if you are a 20 something girl living in India RUN!!! HIDE!!!!!

Dreams n Goodbyes

Probably the shortest I've written but probably the one that makes most sense to me :)

Dreams do come true. Maybe not exactly how or when you wanted it to happen but it happens..

Saying goodbye is probably the hardest thing to do... But 3 points to remember here are:-
1. You have got to be so lucky for the very fact that you have someone in your life whom your going to miss so terribly.
2. Goodbye is a two way handshake. Chances are the other party involved will miss you just as much.
3. The internet is an amazing invention... so.. its never goodbye forever.


"True friendship isn't being inseparable, its being separated and nothing changes"- anonymous

my celebrity look-alikes